Iphone contacts won't sync to mac

Question

Hi
Very new to mac but have searched for this; too many answers with too much variance so I have to ask myself, sorry.
I've had an iphone 4 for 2 years, always syncing contacts with outlook on my old PC. Everything worked fine until icloud; I then found that any new contacts weren't syncing to outlook, I'm assuming because the phone was only syncing to icloud?
No matter, decided not to worry as I wanted to buy a mac, having worked with them recently.
So my issue now is (very similar to before) that I can't sync my contacts from my iphone to my mac, again because it insists the phone is backing up to icloud. I tried this morning; it prompted me that the phone was 'on' icloud and therefore not syncing with mac etc; I checked the box to sync contacts, hit apply and merge in the hopes I could get my contacts from my phone onto the mac. Instead it's created another phone book on my iphone with just the three contacts that were on the mac?!
Now when I go to contacts on my iphone it has three groups: All contacts, all on my iphone and all icloud. The first and last have all my contacts in; the all on my iphone has zero. I know the transition to something new isn't always easy, but I'm now really confused.
The Mac is on Snow Leopard, and my understanding of browsing the forums is that only lion will work with icloud. I haven't bought any software yet, so I'm not concerned about compatibilty if I upgrade. I AM however concerned as to how icloud will work if I do upgrade?
Will it use the iMac or the iphone as the 'senior' device?
If it uses the mac will I lose all my contacts?
With cloud do I not need to backup my iphone?
What's the difference between backup, sync and icloud?
So many questions I know; really hope I'm not shot down in flames as my first time on here. Any advice about this appreciated.

Answer 1

iCloud is a second attempt at dealing with making data available among devices - MobileMe was the first and was limited to just a few things, contacts and calendar events. iCloud goes much further. It isn't easy to meld two or more databases. The first think to keep in mind is that iCloud holds the truth - that is the data that is pushed out everywhere else. If you log on to icloud.com you can see the addressbook and calendar that will be sent to all your devices. The devices' job is to send new data or edited data to the cloud.
With that in mind, I simply upgraded my computer from Snow Leopard to Lion - after turning my phone off. My thinking was that if disaster struck I could delete the computer calendar & addressbook database. Then I could log onto iCloud and make sure my calendar and addressbook was okay and then let the cloud fix the computer. And it true disaster struck I could delete everything in the cloud and turn the iPhone back on which would repopulate the cloud and then my computer.
What actually happened is that after I upgraded to Lion I wound up with an addressbook that had 'on my Mac' and 'on the cloud' which had the same stuff. I deleted the 'on my mac' stuff. My calendar, if I recall right, just had what I expected. I tested by making an event and fact contact on the phone - they appeared on my computer. Did the same on my computer - they appeared on my phone.
Why all the hub-bub over Lion? A couple things. First, there's always an outcry of Mac OS XYZ broke my computer! Not every upgrade goes smoothly. Do a search here for Kappy's upgrade advice, follow it, and your chances of a successful upgrade are pretty good. Second, we've had quite a few OS upgrades in the last 5 years that brought small changes and new services. Lion was different, it really shook things up and lots of people don't like it when their cheese is moved. Third, Lion isn't compatible with old software written before Apple switched to Intel processors and lots of people just don't read before they upgrade.
Should you upgrade? Since SL lost the ability to sync with iOS devices iCloud alone is worth the price of admission. The changes between OS versions always mean that developers stop supporting the older OS at some point and I suspect that Lion changes things enough that SL users are going to find less software being made for the OS pretty rapidly.