Iphone/Itunes help

I have an Iphone and download all my music directly from the Itunes app. I usually transfer my purchases onto a laptop for safe keeping and so I can make cd's. Today I connected my Iphone and somehow lost about the last 5 songs I downloaded, this is really irritating because Itunes doesnt seem to have its own back up system where you can redownload your purchases at any time (at least if it does, i haven't discovered the easy way to do it?). I tried to redownload one of them again but had to pay for it. How can I buy songs and know that if I happen to lose them through no fault of my own, I can re download them at any time? and also, How can I connect my iphone to another laptop without losing either all of my music on my phone or all of the other persons music on their laptop?
Is it just me or is it really frustrating for anyone else that using itunes is really not as simple as it could be!
Thanks for any help anyone can give!

Music purchases can currently only be re-downloaded if you are in the US , if you are anywhere else then you will need to pay if you want to re-download them. The only way to be sure of not losing purchases (even if you are in the US then there is no guarantee that content will remain in the store) is to make and maintain backups . Re-downloading : http://support.apple.com/kb/HT2519
An iPhone is designed to only be synced with one computer at a time, so unless you also have all of your content on other computers that you connect it to then it is probably best/safest not to connect to them.

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