IPhone4 Upgrade to 4.1: No Longer Receive Calls At Home

The wife and I both have the iphone4 and it had been working great until we updated to ios 4.1. Since then neither of us can receive calls or texts at home. We can make calls no problem and send texts as well but we are constantly missing calls, voicemails and text messages. It's not uncommon for us to receive a text 4 hours after it was sent or for a voicemail to show up out of no where.
I'm not 100% positive this problem started because of ios 4.1 but it is really the only thing that has changed on our iphones in the past two weeks when all this started.
Being that we have no home phones, this problem is extremely frustrating for us. I was on the phone with AT&T for around 30 minutes attempting to fix the problem, they thought they had it but literally 10 minutes after I hung up with them problem came back. Restarting the phones usually fixes the problem for 5 to 10 minutes.
I did a full restore to both iphones but the only option I saw during the restore was to install version 4.1 again. I wanted to go back to 4.0.2. Did I do something wrong during the restore? Can I get our phones back to version 4.0.2?
I appreciate any help you can give.

My signal bar is decent at home 2 to 4 bars typically. The 3G is great all the time. When I call others they usually sound fine. I can't remember the last time we had a dropped call at home, it almost never happens.
I don't think I can manually select the carrier.
I'll give AT&T another call and ask about congestion status. I've been meaning to anyway, they told me if the problem persists to call them back. I just need to have both phones on me at the time which can be hard to cooridinate.

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