IPod 30G video using 2 computers to manage iTunes-yikes!

I have 2 iTunes libraries, by purpose or by mistake! My home computer does not have a fast connection (dial-up), so I loaded my CD's from home on it and on to my iPod. My work computer has a T1 line, so I today loaded my iTunes software on it and downloaded some videos and a couple of songs. But then in the process of transferring them onto my iPod, I apparently erased my songs which were already on there. I think I clicked a message box incorrectly. Now my iPod has the video and downloads, but no songs from home. I can't get my home library of songs/cd's back on the iPod. That same message box keeps popping up and I'm afraid to click it again, probably losing my downloads from work.
1) How can I make my home computer my main iPod computer and just use the work computer for downloading? And then transferring the downloads back to my home library.
2) How can I copy my home library/computer songs back onto my iPod, keeping the videos and downloads from today?
3) What settings should I have on home computer iTunes and work computer iTunes so this doesn't happen again? I think it has something to do with manual updates? Which computer (home/work) should have manual and which should be automatic.
I am very frustrated as I know what I'm trying and want to do, but can't figure out how to do it! I am setting the iPod aside until I can find out what to do, so I don't make things worse (either erasing the iPod or the computer, or both!)
THANK YOU so much for your help and advice!

"The iPod "iPod" is linked to another iTunes music library. Do you want to change the link to this iTunes music library and replace all existing songs and playlists on this iPod with those from this library?"
Yes, that's the box I clicked 'yes' to in order to get the downloads onto the iPod, and then my songs already on the iPod disappeared. When I clicked 'no', (first), I couldn't get the downloads on, nothing happened. So then I clicked 'yes' ...
What should I have done? What should I do the next time?
Thanks again!
Daisy

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