IPod frozen and not showing up in iTunes, I've tried everything

My iPod Nano (2nd generation) has "Do not disconnect" on the screen whether or not it is connected to the computer, and it will not show up in iTunes, and I do not think that it is showing up in "My Computer." I think I have tried everything that the support section suggested, but my iPod still says "Do not disconnect" on the screen and iTunes freezes up every time I try to restore it.
What happened:
I went to the iTunes store and bought an album, so then I plugged in my iPod to get those songs on my iPod. If it matters, I'm using my mom's laptop for iTunes because my computer does not have XP, and I plug the iPod into the USB slot. My iPod's screen showed the words "Do not disconnect" and I waited for the iPod to show up on iTunes and for it to say updating or whatever it does when it puts new songs on it. Well the iPod never showed up, and iTunes had frozen. I did the good old "ctrl + atl + delete" and iTunes was not responding so I clicked "End task." Then I went down to click on iTunes again and it would not come up. I tried again, and nothing. I clicked on iTunes in the Start menu and it wouldn't come up. So then I decided to restart the computer so that I could get iTunes to work. The computer turned off, but would not turn on. It showed the same screen for about 10 min and nothing was happening. I was afraid to disconnect the iPod since it still said "Do not disconnect" so it was still plugged in. I then switched off the power on the laptop, and tried to turn it back on. It was stuck on the same screen again, and I waited for about 10 min, and I finally disconnected the iPod and the computer promptly started up. The iPod still said "Do not disconnect," and pushing buttons did nothing. I pulled up iTunes and plugged my iPod back in, but iTunes did not show the iPod on the side like it should. So I closed it and tried again, and after about 20 tries of restarting the computer, unplugging and plugging the iPod, and reopening iTunes, I eventually got the iPod to show and it asked to restore it, so I clicked ok. As it was restoring the bar was moving back and forth and then it just stopped, and I moved the mouse and realized that iTunes had frozen again. I was forced to "End task" and I had to restart the computer. I've gone through this cycle about 20 times, and about every 15 min I will get the iPod to show up on iTunes (but it does not recognize the iPod's name or the type of iPod) and no matter what I try to do next iTunes freezes up and I have to restart the computer. Sorry for the long read, I just didn't want to leave out any detail. I've been trying to get it to work for a few hours and I'm getting very frustrated, any help would be greatly appreciated.
Windows XP
Windows XP
Windows XP

The select button + menu button thing worked, I just realized that when I was trying it before the hold was still on (since I was "toggling it"). I feel stupid...

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See Corrupt iPod classic.
tt2

IPod frozen and not showing up in iTunes, I've tried everything

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