ITunes and iPod not working together. HELP?

So I went to my Mac and put my iPod in it and restored it to factory settings and went to my PC, it said i needed to restore it again, so i did. Now when ever I plug in my ipod, it opens as J drive (J:iPod), so i cant put music on it, etc... when i open itunes, it dosnt show my ipod. ***? and also my ipod says do not disconect and its doing nothing. What shuld i do? (Sorry if someone already had this problem and it was solved, i can't find it if it has happened.)

the weird thing is , after I changed the drive letter , now whenever I connect my video ipod itunes runs automatically .. as if it recognizes the ipod , and yet it still shows none connected !
and when I connect the shuffle , itunes gives me that "do you want to replace the files you have with the ones on the library " thing .... I click no to keep the files I have .. after that it supposed to show me the shuffle , but it does not ! still no ipod connected !
please help !

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