ITunes is telling me my iPad is synced to another library - how can this be?

Hopefully someone can help with this!
I just connected my iPad to my mac mini, opened iTunes, clicked "iPad", and then clicked "music".  I've been having issues with my playlists and was going to try to edit them this way.  iTunes wouldn't let me even see the music on my iPad, and instead gave me a sync option, followed by this message:
Are you sure you want to remove existing music, movies, TV shows, books, and tones from this iPad and sync with this iTunes library?
This is mystifying.  This computer is relatively new - bought it in February - but:
I synced my iPad to my mac mini just a few days ago, with no issues
I've backed my iPad up to this computer once already, so my library should be the same on both devices
I only have one apple id and only use one library
I've also noticed that all of my iTunes playlists have disappeared from my computer, but remain on my iPad - could these two things be connected?
Thanks

Thanks for your quick reply!
I just re-booted my computer and iPad, and re-transferred purchases from my iPad to my computer. 
I'm getting the same error message.  I really don't want to take the risk and "erase" anything on my iPad, even if it should re-sync to the same place as it is now.
I bought some music this morning on my iPad, and it flowed to my computer without any issues, so the wi-fi sync seems to be working as it should, but my iTunes still seems to think I'm synced to another library.
I did notice that if I go to "on this iPad", I can see all of my music.  Maybe from now on I just skip the manual sync option.
This is very strange - is there any chance I could have been hacked?
Anyway, I'm about to start another discussion to find out what is going on with my playlists...

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