ITunes Not working Properly/Not Syncing on Network properly

Hello there,
For weeks and weeks now on my Computer iTunes will not see or recognize my iPhone 4S and my iPad 3. When I try to sync by opening iTunes on desktop and then wake up pho ad iPad it does not see it and will not show them in iTunes no matter what I do. I have reset network, forget network, renew lease on wifi network and shut down both and turned back on and nothing has worked!!! I have reported this many times as well in the past. It is like Apple themselves have changed the way iTunes suyncs with the phone and ipad when trying to sync to make updates on apps.I am at wits end!!! Since they did the update to 10.6.1 it has been a pain in the you know what to sync to update apps.I got to plug both in to computer for them to sync and update apps or update apps from the iphoor ipad itself. Please Apple or someone who knows what needs to be fixed please fix it it is very aggrevating it has been weeks like this and I would have thoughht that Apple would have gotten the hint when I have seen others complain about this as well. It is from what I see most of the time it is with Windows 7 computers that have this syncing connectivity issue but I do see it happen in Wndows Vista as well as I have both operating systems here with 2 iphones, 1 iphone 4s logged in to windows vista when updating apps and the other which is windows 7 and it has ipad 3 and iphone 4s attached to it to sync when updates to apps become available. I hope some can make sense of all this and help or get apple to fix the issue finally!!!!

well, it is easy. i just wish it to sync in a manner that i do not get frustrated with it. it just does not like to sync when i open up itunes on desktop to update apps when they have updates. i have got to revert to plugging in the phone and ipad for it to sync and update apps. if you read through the whole thing you would have found it out. all i am saying is that itunes 10.6.1 and ios 5.1 have bugs and issues that make it hard for a iphone and ipad user to sync and update apps. itunes is slow to open with windows 7 as well as i did not mention that before but i have mentioned it in my other forum posts.
summary:
itunes 10.6.1, is slow to open on windows 7,
syncing ipad and iphone does not update without plugging them in.
wifi sync is not working properly or as it should, it doesn't recognize phone and ipad unless plugged in.

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