ITunes preferences won't save. Please help new user.

If anyone can help me with this I'd be so grateful. I've looked through the other advice I can find on this forum, and on other sites, and have tried the solutions I've found suggested, but nothing's worked so far.
I've tried deleting the preferences files and rebuilding them several times. I've tried reinstalling iTunes several times, too. I've also tried launching iTunes from a different user account, created for the purpose. But I can't get my preferences to save. If I can't set iTunes up the way I'd like it, this could reverse my decision to buy an iPod. I'm not great with computers, and it's driving me to distraction. Any and all advice v gratefully received !

Thanks for the reply!!!
The instructions I used were off this Apple Support site...
http://support.apple.com/kb/HT1751
I get both options to choose as well as create. I used choose when I did mine and it worked.
I did copy her entire itunes library.
This is exactly what is in the folder that I copied...
(folders)
Automatically add to itunes
Downloads
Mobile Applications
Movies
Music
Ringtones
Voice Memos
(XML Document)
Library
I do not see a .itl file anywhere.
I just looked on my file I copied that worked on my user name and I have (3) Itunes Database Files on it.
Thanks so much for the help!!!

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