Itunes says "update complete" but "do not disconnect" never goes away!

So, I wait and wait and "do not disconnect" on my ipod never goes away.
A little history:
I got my nano a few weeks ago, put a few songs on - everything worked fine. Then, I got a new computer. Since I only put a few songs on, I didnt mind starting from scratch. Now, I can't seem to get it to work!? I have songs in itunes. when i click on my ipod, it shows that i have songs on the ipod, it SAYS the update is complete, my ipod shows "do not disconnect" i wait for ages, and then finally just eject the ipod, and - NO SONGS are on it.
help please. thanks
  Windows XP Pro  

Do not disconnect always on, this happens when you have "enable disk use" ticked in the iPod preferences, in which case you have to manually eject your iPod.
However if you are automatically updating your iPod and do not intend using it as a portable hard drive, you can set your iPod to automatically disconnect.
Connect your iPod and in iTunes go to Preferences>iPod. Under the Music tab see if you have your iPod set to automatically sync with iTunes and also have a tick in the box marked “enable disk use". Remove this tick and your iPod should automatically disconnect after it’s finished updating.
If you have your iPod set to manual update, the box will be greyed out and ticked by default, in that case use Safely remove Hardware icon or check this link: "Disconnecting iPod from your computer
" http://docs.info.apple.com/article.html?artnum=61135

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