Mail, I swear has taken on Nigeria for servers

Question

Not once in 6 years have I had one false mail sent to me.
Now all of a sudden, see my Sign-in name.
Apple now forwards mail to me constantly from china
I'm tired of the lame option to bounce mail.
Not once does that option work. Iv'e been bouncing junk for 6 months.
I want severe block period if mail doesn't match my name exactly.
No wait,, this is not my job, I pay for this service.
This is starting to look like how Yahoo used to run their junk servers ten years ago.
Maybe I'm done with any of it.
<Emails Edited by Host>

Answer 1

Ernie,
I don't know about Tristan but I can say;
1- Previously left the SMTP servers I have (about 7 of them, mostly fully authenticated) using the 'typical ports' setting which presumably cycles between 25, 465 and 587.
2- I have had cases where 5 messages have failed to send but only 2 of them appear in the 'outbox'. In that case mail.app was showing as 'Sending' but I was unable to see what it was sending and which smtp server it was trying to use. There was no way to cancel it either (the activity window was no help).
3- I don't use 'Use this Server Only', I typically try every server I have.
The problem is that hotel ISPs typically even try to intercept SMTP over SSL, leading to Mail.app getting royally confused.
Is there any way I can get some better diagnostics on what's really happening here? I usually find that mail.app works OK until it starts trying to send a mail, so my feeling is that I should be concentrating on the SMTP stuff. I have now switched over to using port 587 (for SMTP over SSL) only in the vain hope that the hotel ISPs aren't watching that port- my suspicion is that mail.app is poking port 25 first, getting the intercepted server and then trying to use authenticated SMTP to that (spoofed) server and getting confused- that's born out by the certificate failures I often see when in hotels.
Thanks.