Mail Push Not Working:  Keeping Work and Personal Separate but together!

My understanding (and a big reason I dropped by Blackberry) of Mobile Me was that if I READ an E-mail on iPhone and then deleted it, it would delete it from my iMac at home (or MacBook for work). This does not seem to work? I know there are some issues still with MobileMe so I am trying to be patient.
Do I not have my synche preferences set up right? I want to keep my work (MacBook) mail and contacts separate from my personal (iMac) mail and contacts while receiving both on my iPhone. I want the calenders to merge. Is this possible? How do I set up my preferences on each unit to get this work?
I would imagine there are others out there like me (anyone? anyone?) so hopefully this will be something someone can answer. Thanks!

Having the same problem with yahoo mail not pushing.
I tried endangeredpeople's solution but it didn't work for me.
Has anybody had success with this solution?

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