Moving programs and folders to trash, yet still still there

I'm semi-frustrated novice macbook user. My system has being doing a few weird things lately, like alerting me to mail, to then see no new mail in my box, (though it was on the .mac server) it was very slow. It would freeze. I did the few things I knew, such as clear the cache, reset the power, reset the PRAM...
One of the error messages I kept getting when trying to restart or shut down, was Palm Desktop background error! 50 iSync and the mail server kept asking me for my password over and over even though I was typing it in correctly. Also, suddenly Firefox kept denying me by saying "Only one copy of Firefox may be open at a time..." when I would go to force quit there would be nothing there.
So my thought was to try to delete the Palm OS and Firefox and start over. I even figured out how to find the user profile data folder to trash them too.
But they won't go away. I drag them to the trash, I hear the little "trash" noise, but they do not leave the finder list.
I guess I'm frustrated because I knew how to troubleshoot and optimize performance on my old windows laptop, and I can't seem to make this better. Is this something the phone techs can help me with if I call? I have the service plan.
Any help is appreciated, even if you link me other FAQ's and threads. I've been searching the forums and the Support pages but there is so much and nothing seems to address what I am dealing with.
Thanks,
Gina

Those sites have a lot more of the type of info I need in general, so thanks.
Here is where I am at now, unfortunately. (My post last night was after several glasses of wine and I was very cranky.) As the Mac support tech article describes it: It "powers up without video". I hear the little chime. Then a circle spins endlessly on a gray screen, until a circle with a line through it appears. After a while of trying every trick and tip on the support page, a folder with a question mark on it appeared.
The help page told me to do an "archive and reinstall". So yes I did grab the disc and hold the "C" key etc. I got to step three, asking me for a destination folder to choose, but there was nothing on the screen for me to choose, and I was stuck in limbo again. I closed it down and went to bed. (Or so I thought.) This morning Iopened the book, and on my screen appeared the loading MAC X OS and the rainbow progress line, so I got excited. But it just stayed in that positiion for a minute or two, so I shut it down again. I then tried again to use the disc utility, and this time, got the chime, a gray screen, and nothing at all.
I may just have to make an appointment at the little help counter at the store.
Thanks again for those links. When I get my system up again I will be sure to bookmark them.

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