Moving to an area with NO coverage, still get an ETF?

I've been with verizon since 2004, and always had great coverage. Moved out of state to a very rural area for a few years in that time and never had a problem, didn't have to change a thing.
I'm moving to Simpson, LA in a few weeks and just thought to check the coverage map....there is literally NOTHING. Got panicky and called customer service, who verified that there is no coverage there. None even close to that area. I'm not even talking about 3g or 4g coverage - I don't have any smartphones, I use simple voice/text.
I have 3 lines and my contract end dates are 10/2013, 3/2014, 3/2014. The rep I spoke with was nice, and originally he said that they would probably be able to waive the ETF fee since I don't really have any options here, but after checking he told me it could not be waived.
Is there anything I can do (or buy) to either boost the coverage area somehow (with a device/hardware) to keep my service, or get a discounted/waived ETF if I can't? I'm at a total loss as to what to do now. I was told I could atleast port my numbers to another carrier even though it's in another area, but checking coverage maps for other providers hasn't made me feel any better....two other major carriers show coverage in this area as "satisfactory" or "moderate", which is better than a big fat nothing but still disheartening. I know it's my problem, Verizon isn't forcing me to move to an area with no coverage.....but my FIL is elderly and not doing well so we have to move there to help, hubs will be taking a very big cut in pay at new job so I'm just exploring any possible avenue to not spend money I don't have to - any help is appreciated!

Thanks for the suggestions...the rep I spoke with did tell me I had the option to get someone to take over my contracts, they'd just have to pass the credit check. Unfortunately I don't know anyone in the market for a Verizon contract with 3 lines. I don't think my phones are worth much, since they're 1 1/2 years old and not smartphones. I've got 2 pantech jest II's and a samsung intensity. I just checked-there are no buyers for my models on usell or gazelle.
There is a corporate store in the area I live now, I will definitely give that a try.

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Help please.

Check into amplifiers and antennas:
http://3gstore.com/page/13_will_an_antenna_help_me.html
Perform what is called a Site Survey to collect statistics about your wireless environment. Compare those stats against the Interpret the Results tab of that site to see if anything can be done or not.
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EtreCheck version: 1.9.15 (52)
Report generated August 30, 2014 at 6:56:41 PM EDT
Hardware Information: ?
    iMac (21.5-inch, Mid 2011) (Verified)
    iMac - model: iMac12,1
    1 2.5 GHz Intel Core i5 CPU: 4 cores
    4 GB RAM
Video Information: ?
    AMD Radeon HD 6750M - VRAM: 512 MB
        iMac 1920 x 1080
System Software: ?
    OS X 10.9.4 (13E28) - Uptime: 0 days 0:16:53
Disk Information: ?
    ST3120026AS disk0 : (120.03 GB)
    S.M.A.R.T. Status: Verified
        EFI (disk0s1) <not mounted>: 209.7 MB
        Untitled (disk0s2) / [Startup]: 119.17 GB (87.12 GB free)
        Recovery HD (disk0s3) <not mounted>: 650 MB
    HL-DT-STDVDRW GA32N
USB Information: ?
    Apple Inc. FaceTime HD Camera (Built-in)
    CHICONY USB NetVista Full Width Keyboard
    Apple Inc. BRCM2046 Hub
        Apple Inc. Bluetooth USB Host Controller
    Apple Computer, Inc. IR Receiver
    Apple Internal Memory Card Reader
Thunderbolt Information: ?
    Apple Inc. thunderbolt_bus
Gatekeeper: ?
    Anywhere
Kernel Extensions: ?
    [loaded]    com.nvidia.CUDA (1.1.0) Support
    [loaded]    com.sophos.kext.sav (9.0.61 - SDK 10.7) Support
    [loaded]    com.sophos.nke.swi (9.0.53 - SDK 10.8) Support
Startup Items: ?
    CUDA: Path: /System/Library/StartupItems/CUDA
    FanControlDaemon: Path: /Library/StartupItems/FanControlDaemon
Launch Daemons: ?
    [loaded]    com.adobe.fpsaud.plist Support
    [running]    com.arcsoft.eservutil.plist Support
    [running]    com.bjango.istatmenusdaemon.plist Support
    [loaded]    com.oracle.java.Helper-Tool.plist Support
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    [running]    com.sophos.configuration.plist Support
    [running]    com.sophos.intercheck.plist Support
    [running]    com.sophos.notification.plist Support
    [running]    com.sophos.scan.plist Support
    [running]    com.sophos.sxld.plist Support
    [running]    com.sophos.webd.plist Support
Launch Agents: ?
    [running]    com.arcsoft.esinter.plist Support
    [running]    com.bjango.istatmenusagent.plist Support
    [loaded]    com.nvidia.CUDASoftwareUpdate.plist Support
    [loaded]    com.oracle.java.Java-Updater.plist Support
    [running]    com.sophos.uiserver.plist Support
User Login Items: ?
    Macs Fan Control
    Firefox
Internet Plug-ins: ?
    FlashPlayer-10.6: Version: 14.0.0.176 - SDK 10.6 Support
    Flash Player: Version: 14.0.0.176 - SDK 10.6 Support
    QuickTime Plugin: Version: 7.7.3
    JavaAppletPlugin: Version: Java 7 Update 67 Check version
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Audio Plug-ins: ?
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    AirPlay: Version: 2.0 - SDK 10.9
    AppleAVBAudio: Version: 203.2 - SDK 10.9
    iSightAudio: Version: 7.7.3 - SDK 10.9
iTunes Plug-ins: ?
    Quartz Composer Visualizer: Version: 1.4 - SDK 10.9
3rd Party Preference Panes: ?
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    Flash Player Support
    Java Support
Time Machine: ?
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Top Processes by CPU: ?
         1%    WindowServer
         1%    fontd
         0%    firefox
         0%    SystemUIServer
         0%    SophosWebIntelligence
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    156 MB    SophosScanD
    152 MB    InterCheck
    131 MB    com.apple.IconServicesAgent
    115 MB    SophosAntiVirus
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    1.53 GB    Active RAM
    1.37 GB    Inactive RAM
    699 MB    Wired RAM
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    0 B    Page-outs

I'd start by getting rid of the following software responsible for these extensions.
Kernel Extensions: ?
    [loaded]    com.nvidia.CUDA (1.1.0) Support
    [loaded]    com.sophos.kext.sav (9.0.61 - SDK 10.7) Support
    [loaded]    com.sophos.nke.swi (9.0.53 - SDK 10.8) Support
Startup Items: ?
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    FanControlDaemon: Path: /Library/StartupItems/FanControlDaemon
Use the uninstaller provided with the Sophos software. You can uninstall CUDA via the preference pane. Be sure you remove the com.nvidia.CUDA extension which is located in the /System/Library/Extensions/ folder. Not sure if Fan Control has an uninstaller so you will have to do it manually:
Uninstalling Software: The Basics
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Boot to the Recovery HD:
Restart the computer and after the chime press and hold down the COMMAND and R keys until the menu screen appears. Alternatively, restart the computer and after the chime press and hold down the OPTION key until the boot manager screen appears. Select the Recovery HD and click on the downward pointing arrow button.
Repair
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Reinstall Lion, Mountain Lion, or Mavericks
OS X Mavericks- Reinstall OS X
OS X Mountain Lion- Reinstall OS X
OS X Lion- Reinstall Mac OS X
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Moving to an area with marginal Verizon coverage.

Moving to an area in Florida (Manatee Co.) with poor signal for cell phone and MiFi. Is there a way to boost my incoming signal, out going signal or both without abandoning my Verizon carrier? If you care to email me directly with any ideas I would appreciate it. The local outlets/stores do not have a clue about how to answer my question.
Thank you,
GOrndorff
Private info removed as required by the Terms of Service.
Message was edited by: Admin Moderator

You must be moving to east of I-75 in Manatee County because the signal near Bradenton should be pretty good. I would suggest a network extender but it seems you'll be using Verizon as your internet connection so that wouldn't do any good.

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<Edited By Host>

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Moving to an area with NO coverage, still get an ETF?

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