Multiple devices with iMessage, FaceTime and calendar in the cloud

Hi
There are a number of posts on this, but this is what I do and the issues I face:
My wife and I use a common apple ID for:
Notes
Reminders
Calandars
Photostream (when it works, but there are other postings on that)
Apps
i.e everything else, Music, apps, and addresses are on our Windows PC
We have made a number of sub-IDs for our four devices (iphone 5s and 5 plus iPad 1 with IOS6? and iPad 3) can get the correct emails and iMessages they should and FaceTime rings where it should.
We have done this by selecting where to receive (at) our messages in settings, e.g. the iPhones use our phone numbers as references. The iPads use a gmail address that we have identified under our one Applie ID. Here can be crossover, but I get my messages and my wife gets hers
With the addressbook in the cloud, we can arange here medical and other appointments very easily and synce the stuff everywhere. Notes and reminders. This leaves books music and other stuff safely on the PC, backed up, and only updated when we sync.
This works well, and only when a cloud document is changed in error, do we pay for doing it this way. If my wife were more able, I suppose that she could easily edit the settig details to read my messages, but she has no wish to do this,
This is all fine, buit since IOS 7, whenever a SIM is swapped, I travel a lot, iTunes and iMessages are st to receive everything on all devices. So, my wife gets my messages and I hers. I have to manually fix these, not an onerous task, now I have done it so many times, and have documemnted it; just ver frustrating.
I am in the UK now, my wife is in hospital and does not have enough ability to fix the stuation over the phone.I will have to live with this and a temporary phone (that I got for messages and calls).
What I would like to know is:
1 - Is there a way to stop IOS 7 updating the Mesage / FaceTime read / contact a locaions everytime I change a SIM?
2 - Short of creating a new Apple ID for iCloud, and not being able to share calendars, notes, reminders and photostream (when it works), is there a way around this?
When I gave back home, I will fix the devices up again to make sure we get our separate messages and details. My next UK trip will involve taking the second phone with me.
Any ideas welcome.
Tony

Poulton-le-Fylde, UK
Do I have a choice as to what actually gets transferred into the cloud or does it take what it wants? What if I don't care to share particular data with another device, does the cloud take it anyway?

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