My cat sat on my keyboard and now my computer is talking.

How do I get this incessant commentary on my activity to STOP??
I can't even mute it. Please help.

Turn off VoiceOver in the Universal Access or Accessibility pane of System Preferences.
(96772)

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    Click the [Click for details] links for more information about that line.
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        MacBook Pro (13-inch, Early 2011) (Technical Specifications)
        MacBook Pro - model: MacBookPro8,1
        1 2.3 GHz Intel Core i5 CPU: 2-core
        4 GB RAM Upgradeable
            BANK 0/DIMM0
                2 GB DDR3 1333 MHz ok
            BANK 1/DIMM0
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        Bluetooth: Old - Handoff/Airdrop2 not supported
        Wireless:  en1: 802.11 a/b/g/n
        Battery Health: Normal - Cycle count 297
    Video Information: ℹ️
        Intel HD Graphics 3000 - VRAM: 384 MB
            Color LCD 1280 x 800
    System Software: ℹ️
        OS X 10.10.2 (14C109) - Time since boot: 0:7:0
    Disk Information: ℹ️
        Hitachi HTS545032B9A302 disk0 : (320.07 GB)
            EFI (disk0s1) <not mounted> : 210 MB
            Recovery HD (disk0s3) <not mounted>  [Recovery]: 650 MB
            Macintosh HD (disk1) / : 318.84 GB (174.85 GB free)
                Encrypted AES-XTS Unlocked
                Core Storage: disk0s2 319.21 GB Online
        MATSHITADVD-R   UJ-898
    USB Information: ℹ️
        Apple Inc. Apple Internal Keyboard / Trackpad
        Apple Inc. BRCM2070 Hub
            Apple Inc. Bluetooth USB Host Controller
        Apple Inc. FaceTime HD Camera (Built-in)
        Apple Computer, Inc. IR Receiver
    Thunderbolt Information: ℹ️
        Apple Inc. thunderbolt_bus
    Gatekeeper: ℹ️
        Mac App Store and identified developers
    Kernel Extensions: ℹ️
            /System/Library/Extensions
        [not loaded]    com.devguru.driver.SamsungComposite (1.1.0) [Click for support]
        [not loaded]    com.logmein.driver.LogMeInSoundDriver (1.0.3 - SDK 10.5) [Click for support]
            /System/Library/Extensions/ssuddrv.kext/Contents/PlugIns
        [not loaded]    com.devguru.driver.SamsungACMControl (1.1.0) [Click for support]
        [not loaded]    com.devguru.driver.SamsungACMData (1.1.0) [Click for support]
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        [failed]    com.apple.ucupdate.plist
        [failed]    com.apple.watchdogd.plist [Click for details]
    Launch Agents: ℹ️
        [not loaded]    com.google.keystone.agent.plist [Click for support]
        [not loaded]    com.hp.help.tocgenerator.plist [Click for support]
        [not loaded]    com.logmein.LMILaunchAgentFixer.plist [Click for support]
        [not loaded]    com.logmein.logmeingui.plist [Click for support]
        [not loaded]    com.logmein.logmeinguiagent.plist [Click for support]
        [not loaded]    com.logmein.logmeinguiagentatlogin.plist [Click for support]
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        [not loaded]    com.adobe.fpsaud.plist [Click for support]
        [not loaded]    com.google.keystone.daemon.plist [Click for support]
        [not loaded]    com.logmein.logmeinblanker.plist [Click for support]
        [not loaded]    com.logmein.logmeinserver.plist [Click for support]
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        [not loaded]    com.microsoft.office.licensing.helper.plist [Click for support]
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        [not loaded]    com.adobe.ARM.[...].plist [Click for support]
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        [not loaded]    com.google.GoogleContactSyncAgent.plist [Click for support]
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        iTunesHelper    UNKNOWN Hidden (missing value)
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        Android File Transfer Agent    Application  (/Users/[redacted]/Library/Application Support/Google/Android File Transfer/Android File Transfer Agent.app)
        HP Product Research    Application  (/Library/Application Support/Hewlett-Packard/Customer Participation/HP Product Research.app)
        HPEventHandler    Application  (/Library/Printers/hp/hpio/HPEventHandler.app)
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        o1dbrowserplugin: Version: 5.40.2.0 - SDK 10.8 [Click for support]
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        FlashPlayer-10.6: Version: 17.0.0.134 - SDK 10.6 [Click for support]
        LogMeIn: Version: 1.0.660 [Click for support]
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        LogMeInSafari32: Version: 1.0.660 [Click for support]
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        googletalkbrowserplugin: Version: 5.40.2.0 - SDK 10.8 [Click for support]
        AdobePDFViewer: Version: 10.0.1 [Click for support]
        SharePointBrowserPlugin: Version: 14.1.0 [Click for support]
        iPhotoPhotocast: Version: 7.0 - SDK 10.7
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        Flash Player  [Click for support]
    Time Machine: ℹ️
        Time Machine not configured!
    Top Processes by CPU: ℹ️
             7%    ocspd
             4%    WindowServer
             1%    kextd
             0%    ps
             0%    securityd
    Top Processes by Memory: ℹ️
        137 MB    Microsoft Word
        120 MB    Safari
        86 MB    ocspd
        82 MB    CalendarAgent
        77 MB    WindowServer
    Virtual Memory Information: ℹ️
        310 MB    Free RAM
        1.89 GB    Active RAM
        1.55 GB    Inactive RAM
        544 MB    Wired RAM
        1.13 GB    Page-ins
        8 KB    Page-outs
    Diagnostics Information: ℹ️
        Apr 5, 2015, 09:32:47 AM    Self test - passed
        Apr 5, 2015, 09:30:05 AM    /Users/[redacted]/Library/Logs/DiagnosticReports/AdobeResourceSynchronizer_2015 -04-05-093005_[redacted].crash
        Apr 4, 2015, 01:12:41 PM    /Users/[redacted]/Library/Logs/DiagnosticReports/AdobeResourceSynchronizer_2015 -04-04-131241_[redacted].crash
        Apr 4, 2015, 08:13:57 AM    /Users/[redacted]/Library/Logs/DiagnosticReports/AdobeResourceSynchronizer_2015 -04-04-081357_[redacted].crash

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    OS X Mavericks- Reinstall OS X
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