My husband just bought an ipad and now when we message each other we get the same message to our iphones, how do we stop this?

When I send a message to the ipad, from my iphone, I get the same message to my phone from my own number.  He also gets one to his iphone when he sends me a message from his ipad.  I know this has something to do with the apple id; we do use the same one.  Is there a way to turn off the multiple messages? We don't want to get separate apple ids because the guy at the apple store told us we wouldn't be able to share the music we have....meaning music on my id wouldn't show up with the music on his id in our itunes.  So we switched to using one account.  Is there a way to fix this problem without having to create a separate apple id?

Apple ID cannot be merged or transfered.
Read this tips
iOS 5 & iCloud Tips: Sharing an Apple ID With Your Family

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