My phone will not back up!! help please!

Hi all!!
so ive recently updated my iphone 4 to iOS5 after several frustrating attempts, constantly coming up with some error message. this was very surprising to me and i started searching through forums after forums to see whether this issue was only happening to me, turns out that apple servers were crashing because too many people were trying to get the software update at the same time. thinking i can live without iOS5 for a few days, i ignored the problem and didnt attempt to update again a week or so later.
i tried to update the software again yet the same error occured, (-5000). after some research, i found out that this was due to some folder permission problem.. the phone failed to get past the "backing up" stage (the status bar stays at the same place). this was somewhat strange as a few days before i first attempted to update the software, my phone was sync-ing fine. i thought that, "maybe it's because my phone is new and hasnt been manually backed up before", and also have been told by friends that some times their back up takes close to an hour. so one night i left the phone "backing up" overnight hoping that in the morning it wouldve backed up, however, in the morning the status bar remain at the same position as when left it and went to sleep.
non of my friends have ever encountered such a problem and i have searched the web inside out for an answer!! one thread suggested that i uninstall itunes and reinstall it. i did to no success. another thread suggested to delete the backup file and attempt the back up again. i tried but again in vain. being very frustrated, i took a deep breath and clicked the "continue" button which restored my phone and implemented the software update thinking this problem will alleviate itself. after getting iOS5 and having my phone restored to factory settings, i had to put back all my songs, contacts, photos apps etc etc. i then proceeded to back up my phone under the new OS hoping something along the lines of completely restoring will never happen again. however, the exact same error message poped up!!
PLEASE HELP!! i have no idea how this situation arose. i havent done anything out of the ordinary except for this one time where i charged my phone on a friend's laptop a day prior my first attempt at updating the software, the phone simply charge for around 2 hours and didnt sync at all. any help will be greatly appreciated

sync-ing shouldn't have anything to do with other people sycn-ing does it?
also whenever the status bar or the backup stops, itunes seems to stop working aswell and freeze. this is again frustrating as i have to go to task manager to close itunes and start it up again

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