New monitor/calibration; now colors won't display correctly in ACR and Elements

Question

Just got a new ASUS LCD monitor, and calibrated it with the Spyder 3 Express. 
Now when I open a .CR2 file using Elements to edit the RAW image, the color is displayed as yellowy-gray and dull.  It looks the same when I pull it into Elements 7, unless I remove all color management (which, if I save the image, actually then renders the image colors neon and oversaturated with lots of pink and red tones).
I also use Lightroom 3 and I am having the same problem there.  Upon import of either an edited Jpeg or a .CR2 RAW file, the color in Lightroom is displayed as dull, grayish yellowy-green. 
If I export and view the very same image in GIMP, Picasa or on the web, as long as the colorspace is intact (sRGB), the color is accurate.  Not so in Elements or Lightroom.
If you have experience with this problem is it the monitor, the calibration, or Elements and Lightroom.  I am beyond frustrated and need to see my colors properly.  I have not had this problem before.

Answer 1

I don't use Spyder to calibrate my monitor; instead, I use the software and tool that X-Rite makes and it came with my NEC wide-gamut monitor. I suspect that the tools are similar.
First, make certain that you're using your Spyder spectrometer and the accompanying software correctly. Although I consider myself relatively computer saavy, I find that I have to follow the instructions carefully.
Then, calibrate your monitor so that the colors and brightness the monitor displays are correct for your printer setup. In my case, the tool uses ICC color standards to set the colors. And, I tell it I want the monitor's brightness to be 90 candelas per square meter (cd/m2), which is about the same brightness as a blank white piece of photo paper. With the monitor brightness set at 90 cd/m2, I avoid getting prints that are too dark. If you calibrate the monitor correctly, the colors should look good and you should have a white that looks white and a black that looks black - that is, you shouldn't have any colors that don't look right.
Second, when you use Elements (PSE) or Lightroom (LR) to print, be sure to indicate that you want PSE or LR to control the colors and not the printer. It's very important, too, that you have the correct printer-paper profiles downloaded into the printer driver and that you select the correct paper profile. I have an Epson 3880 printer and I use Epson papers (mostly); so, I tell PSE to use the profile that fits the paper I'm using - for example, Epson Premium Glossy. When I downloaded the printer driver into my computer, it also downloaded the Epson paper-printer profiles and they appear in the print dialog boxes used during the printing process. (Other paper manufacturers, such as Ilford, make profiles available for downloading on their website.)
I hope this helps; if it doesn't let's go into some more.