Phone crashes every time i try to update software

ok so from the very first day i got my phone when i tried to do the first software update it gets to the screen that says "preparing iphone for software update" and never goes anywhere i left it like that for hours and nothing was happening. so i tried to restore it and it stopped at "preparing iphone for restore" and never went anywhere. i went to the apple store and it restored there just fine. so my screen starts messing up and they replaced the phone for me. i got home and tried to sync all my music back up and it wouldn't start syncing so i clicked the software update button again and guess what? "preparing iphone for software update" AGAIN! so i went upstairs and got another computer and brought it down here (practically the same model computer haha) and have had a crapload of issues trying to get itunes running on it (pc... what do you expect) finally do now when i plug the phone in (it still needs to be restored again mind you) itunes does not recognize it. can somebody friggin help me? i am so close to throwing this phone through the window of the apple store!

hellllp pleeeeaaaassseee

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