POP3 email marked as read on server before being read

Problem: Emails downloaded to my iPhone are marked as read on the server, even when they have not been read on either the iPhone, server/webmail or any other email client. When iPhone recieves a new email, it is listed as unread on the phone but on the server's webmail the same email will be listed as read. This sounds exactly like the problem described here, but unfortunately there was no solution to that discussion. The main issue for me when trying to find the new/unread email via webmail, when my inbox is sorted by conversation/thread, is that all the emails look the same. The new email is not highlighted differently (ie. unread) to the other 99 emails on the page and so is difficult to find.
More information: My iPhone is supplied by my employer and is used primarily for work. The primary mail account is configured to sync with my employer's Exchange server. This all works fine. I have added a second account to send/retrieve SMTP/POP3 email to/from my home ISP's mail server. This all works fine too (but with the above mentioned problem). With my previous phone (Windows Mobile), this same setup worked fine but without items on the server being marked as read.
Example: At work, on my PC, I have a web browser tab open on my home ISP's webmail page. The iPhone chimes and displays a new email notice on its lockscreen. Without touching the iPhone, I check my webmail on the PC to read the new email. In the list of emails in my webmail Inbox, the new email is already marked as read, even though I have not yet opened it on the iPhone nor via webmail. Futher to this, if I send myself an email from work to home, and immediately check my webmail, I can see the email listed as unread. Without opening the email, if I allow the iPhone to check for new email (or manually make it check) but do not open the new email, then refresh the webmail page, that new email has now become marked as read.
Further information: My ISP does not offer IMAP; this is stated very clearly on their user help/email setup wiki pages. My iPhone is configured to use their POP3 server address and port 110, the same as I have configured on my home PC. My work email account is configured for Push, my home account is configured for Fetch - hourly. The account advanced settings... Deleted Messages=never remove, Use SSL=off, Authentication=password, Delete from server=never, Server Port=110, S/MIME=off.
Any ideas that the heck is going on here?

Use OWA (Outlook Web Access) Not POP3 Settings
Use OWA (Outlook Web Access) Not POP3 Settings
Use OWA (Outlook Web Access) Not POP3 Settings
Okay.  This is doing this because your bb is not logging into the owa (outlook web access), it's using  POP3.  In order to use owa it must be enabled on your exchange server (ask your admin if you have this option).  An owa address is something like https://mail.yourcompay.com/owa, depending how your admin set this up it could be named something else.  You can either get to this option through your phone companys (BIS) website or on the bb itself.
If you use your phone companys website (BIS) to configure this option just log in and find the topic that reads something like this -
 "How do I set up BlackBerry Internet E-mail using a My T-Mobile Account?"
This will give you the instruction for setting up the account for owa.  (Took me a little bit to find this in my tmobile account.)  During this setup there should be an option to check called use owa.  You have completed the setup and never saw that option then start over and find that option.
If you go through the bb's setting on the actual device the way to get to this option is kind of strange (at least it was the only way I could figure out how to get to it on my phone).
I started by deleting the email account off the phone then added a new account.  Go back to the account setting and change the password to a wrong password.  After you select "ok" or "next"  or whatever to get to the next screen you will get a message saying could not connect to server or error or something like that.  Now you should have a option to configure the device manually.  This option will get you to page to allow you to select OWA.  Then just configure you bb for owa and you are good to go.
Sorry this is such a crude post.  I usually take the time to give very accurate, step-by-step instructions, but I do not have time.  Good luck to all with this issue. 

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    Use OWA (Outlook Web Access) Not POP3 Settings
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     "How do I set up BlackBerry Internet E-mail using a My T-Mobile Account?"
    This will give you the instruction for setting up the account for owa.  (Took me a little bit to find this in my tmobile account.)  During this setup there should be an option to check called use owa.  You have completed the setup and never saw that option then start over and find that option.
    If you go through the bb's setting on the actual device the way to get to this option is kind of strange (at least it was the only way I could figure out how to get to it on my phone).
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