Recover apple id, iTunes, Mac & AppleTV

I have a problem with an apple id.
This id was created on what is now an obsolete email account.
However, it's been a latent problem b/c the old service provider still operates that account, which is set to forward emails to the new email account.
This appears to be currently the case.
The apple ID was working fine on iTunes on a Mac, last time I tried it.
Yesterday, I attempted to purchase a movie on an older generation Apple TV. I have done this in the recent past, and it worked fine.
This time, it asked me for Apple ID and password. I input this data, and it refused to accept it, several tries later.
I then went to a browser on a mac and attempted a direct login to this apple ID. sure enough, it wouldn't allow login.
After 3 tries, it locked the ID for 8 hours.
At present, I have verified it's still the case that I can't log in with the old credentials.
I then ask it to send an email re-set of the Apple ID password (verification worked yesterday, received those emails at the new email address via the old email address). Now, I am not recieving any re-set email.
Please help! This is our main apple ID and we are desperately trying to spend money on iTunes but Apple seems to want to miss another quarter by denying access
thanks in advance

here is an update
it turns out that if I tell apple's apple id manager page that i can't remember my appleID itself (vs. password), it will send a reset to the new email address. after resetting the password, it sends a confirmationf or an AppleID listed as the NEW email address. that is what I was missing.
So, I went and checked out active download account on iTunes, and it is configured to an appleID which is the string defining the OLD email address!
and of course, I can't view the account there b/c the old password isn't working, and I can't seem to reset that account.
Any response I am getting from apple is for a NEW appleID that I was unaware had been generated, using the string for the NEW email address.
To this, I have to say to Apple, ***?!!!
this is decidedly un-Apple like behavior. More like ... Microsoft.
If I manage to get a human on the phone at apple, I'll update with an explanation and solution. In the meantime, would appreciate any helpful input from the community.
thx

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