Remote app won't connect to itunes (Iphone 5 & MBP)

I currently have a iPhone 5 and a MacBook Pro and am trying to connect them using the remote app (the latest version).  Both are running on the same wireless network.  I have gone through the troubleshooting items as found here: http://support.apple.com/kb/TS1741. 
I have tried:
---deleting the app & reinstalling
---turning on/off home sharing on both the Mac and iPhone
---resetting the router
---changing the router to WPA2
---turning on/off the Mac and iPhone
When I open the remote app, I can see my itunes library logo and I click on it to connect, but it then takes several seconds and then tells me "Remote can't connect to your iTunes library.  Check your network settings and try again."  I have also tried adding an itunes library with the passcode deal, and that does not work either.  I will type in the CORRECT passcode, but then it tells me its incorrect (what the heck?).  I will do it again, and this time it thinks for quite a while and then still tells me its incorrect.
This has been super frusterating, and knowledge about these issues seem to be scattered all over these forums.  Has anyone had success overcoming this issue by doing something else that I have not tried?

I have this same issue. I can connect to my AppleTV fine but not Itunes on my MAC. It has worked for me previously with my Windows PC but I cannot for the life of me get it to connect to Itunes running on my MacBook Air. I am running the latest software on all devices. Both are connected to the same network using an airport express. There has to be something wrong here.
Jay

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