Setting the server connection timeout, Mac Mail

I have several POP accounts setup through Mac Mail and lately I've been running into problems where I can't send messages because of "two many simultaneous connections". I was told by my email host that it is likely caused by my email client maintaining an open connection with the server or idling, etc... I don't fully understand what they are referring to as I can't seem to locate any settings that pertain to this.
A brief search shows this could be relevant to an IMAP account, but that is not how I configured them. Does anyone have any experience modifying how Mac Mail connects to the email servers, and closes the connection after send / receive is complete?
Thanks
Stephen

Mail sent via att.net comes through as "via Yahoo" when I send something to Gmail, so I assume it's the case in California.
I looked at all the headers.  Gmail is not involved nor would I expect it to be, at least when I send something.
I got my info here:  ...
Hmmm.  Looks like my yahoo servers still work but sometime in the last three years AT&T changed their server names to the ones on that page.  I just changed my server settings in Eudora (and also mail.app) to inbound.att.net and outbound.att.net and they work too.  I guess I'll leave them to those "new" (new to me) servers.
And by the way, outbound.att.net doesn't support SSL, or at least seems not to since Mail bottoms out with the eternally spinning wheel whenever I check that option.
Actually it does.  Note I said above all I changed was the servers, not any port, ssl, or authorization info.  And it works as expected.  So that's why you saw the rotating cursor, it was hanging when shaking hands with the server.
If you look at table on that AT&T page, last two rows (incoming/outgoing port #) is shows the info I listed previously, i.e., ports and ssl.
Anyway, thanks for making me aware of the server (change -- change from my point of view anyway).

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