Still can't connect with PC

Well, at this point I've spent at least 15 hours trying to troubleshoot why I can't connect in iChat with my daughter on her XP machine, and still no luck. I've read a lot of the threads here, but nothing mentioned seems to work.
I have a Mini mac running OSX 10.4.8, with firewall off, and an external iSite camera. My daughter has a PC running XP and turns her firewall off before we try to connect. The sequence of events is as follows:
I open iChat, and my daughter appears on my Buddy list with a green dot and an active (green) camera icon. I click the camera icon for her name, and a message appears "starting video chat" with the revolving gear. 10 seconds later (exactly, all the time) I get the message "There was a connection error during your chat". When I click on the button not to send a report to Apple and can see the screen underneath, I see the message "Failed to start video chat because (I) did not respond." This happens whether I invite her to chat, or she invites me and I accept. On her end, she gets the message "The invitation was retracted because another instance accepted it."
I had a friend with a MacBook Pro go over to my daughter's house to help us troubleshoot. He was able to connect with her PC from his Mac. We checked all the settings we could think of (he's also on OSX 10.4.8) and couldn't find anything different between our two machines' settings (though of course he's on a G5 and the mini mac is G4). He and I were able to communicate fine using iChat between his MacBook Pro and my mini Mac.
The one saving grace is that I finally had him download Skype onto my daughter's computer, and we were able to get a video chat working using Skype between the PC and my miniMac. So I guess I shouldn't complain, but the iChat image and sound (between our two Macs) were a good bit better that what I am getting over Skype, and I would love to be able to connect with iChat.
Any other thoughts or suggestions before I finally give up on iChat?
Thanks for any help.

Hi TCV,
Which version of AIm is she trying ?
Has she tuned the app to the camera and mic if it is AIM 5.9 ?
(Press F£ scroll down to Live Video and then the "Tuning" Button)
Did she allow the AIM application as an Exception ? As turning the Firewall Off does not always work.
See here http://www.ralphjohnsuk.dsl.pipex.com/page12.html#_Service
We know the ports for iChat must be open in her modem or any separate router but is it the same for the AIM App ?
AIM 6.1.32.1 is producing better success to Mac OS 10.4.9
1:48 PM Sunday; April 8, 2007

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