Stop all notifications on mac

I'd like to stop notifications so I can actually use my computer for work, not a toy where I am constantly swiping away annoying popups. Some items I was "allowed" to remove from notification center (none should be included, by default.) Additionaly, I've had to disable software update, which I wanted to keep on, just to prevent some additional notifications. However, the mac app store continues to remind me every few minutes that new software is ready to be installed, and this won't go away, nor will it stop automatically checking for updates. How can I stop these irritating distractions? Do I have to get a Windows machine for the first time in my life?

If you keep getting App Store notifications on updates that often, you must have tons of software installed... all for work, no games, right?
For notifications, in general: System Preferences -> Notifications, in the upper right corner, but you seem to have found it already.
For notifications on SW updates: System Preferences -> Software Update, and you seem to be familiar with this too, since you already disabled it.
Now what else? You can configure everything, and the machine keeps working... that does set it apart from a Windoze machine which will more likely go totally silent, no?
(Message was edited.)

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Click to view full size
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Disable All Notifications

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http://support.apple.com/kb/HT5463
iOS: Understanding airplane mode
http://support.apple.com/kb/ht1355
This link will provide you with information on how to optimize the battery life of your iPhone:
Apple - Batteries - iPhone
http://www.apple.com/batteries/iphone.html
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Stop all notifications on mac

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