Sync issues - itunes on 2 computers

I've had my ipad for a few weeks and have bought tons of apps. Since then I tried to transfer some movie files to my ipad using the "digital copy" that comes with some blu-ray disks. My computer won't read these disks for some reason and just spits them back out (stupid Alienware $2500 laptop - I am not pleased).
BUT my old crappy Dell laptop does read them just fine. So I load itunes on that, successfully transfer the movies to that itunes and hook up my ipad. Of course itunes doesn't like that my ipad is already using a different itunes on a different computer, so my choices are "erase this ipad and sync with this new itunes database" or "pound sand, Jack". I played a little bit with it and yup, itunes wasn't kidding - if I want to use the new install to transfer the movies to the pad, it is going to erase all 7 pages of apps in the process.
So my best option is to use my old laptop just for syncing my ipad. What a waste but it might be the best way. How do I get the itunes on my old computer to have all the stuff I;ve bought on it so I can have my movies and my apps on it?
There must be a better way to manage this stuff.
Any help is super appreciated.
J

We live in 2 seperate areas during the year. I try to sync my and my wife's ipods to the computer in the house we are currently living in. I've tried making differential updates to transport to the other computer and I've tried making a total backup and transferring that onto the other computer. Neither work as advertised.
Whenever I change computers, I get a message telling me that the ipods are synced to another computer, etc -- no big deal, I can live with that. However, after syncing with the new computer, I find that all the flags indicating the play status have been reset, play lists are nested into other play lists, some playlists have been changed, and, finally, some items are missing.
Right now, I am being told, on this computer, that music I bought and videos - including a home video that I MADE - are not authorized to run on this machine! The irony is that they were ALL originally installed on THIS machine, ran last summer AND ran this past winter when xfered to our winter computer!!
Guess what I'm saying is, "lots of luck, your going to need it."

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    Time of this report: 4/24/2011, 10:13:44
    Machine name: DEREK
    Operating System: Windows XP Professional (5.1, Build 2600) Service Pack 3 (2600.xpsp_sp3_gdr.101209-1647)
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              Monitor: Plug and Play Monitor
      Monitor Max Res: 1600,1200
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             Registry: OK
         DDraw Status: Enabled
           D3D Status: Enabled
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    DDraw Test Result: Not run
    D3D7 Test Result: Not run
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    Sound Devices
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    EAX(tm) 2.0 Listen/Src: Yes, Yes
       I3DL2(tm) Listen/Src: No, No
    Sensaura(tm) ZoomFX(tm): No
                   Registry: OK
          Sound Test Result: Not run
                Description: SoundMAX Digital Audio
    Default Sound Playback: No
    Default Voice Playback: No
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            Registry: OK
         Test Result: Not run

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    I use my iphone to keep contacts and calendars synced between my office and home computers, which it does nicely (asking me each time I switch machines whether I want to merge or replace the data--to which I always reply merge).
    I thought Itunes was NOT supposed to be able to sync music with more than one computer--that it was supposed to produce a message saying, "The iPhone "xx" is synced with another iTunes library. Do you want to erase this iPhone and sync with this iTunes library?" And then let me opt out of syncing the music, while still merging the calendar and contacts files. That's exactly what happened with my previous office computer.
    Since setting up my new office computer, however, Itunes on both computers WANTS to sync the music on each. That would be fine, if it were syncing my music BETWEEN the two computers (leaving me the same tunes on each computer and on the iphone), but it's not--instead it's alternatively syncing with one and then the other, removing stuff I bought at home every time I sync at the office. If I try to tell the office computer NOT to sync the music, it warns me that that would mean erasing everything on the iphone.
    Anyone have any ideas about what's going on here and how I can correct it?
    Thanks!

    No, unfortunately you can't sync your music from your iPhone to your computer.
    I'd suggest using and external disk to transfer your music from your XP system to your new MBP. You'll just have to authorize your account in iTunes when you first play the songs.
    If you have an iPod, you can use that as a disk to transfer the music: http://docs.info.apple.com/article.html?artnum=93651 or you can use any other hard disk.
    Once you have the songs on your Mac, just sync. The songs on currently on your iPhone will be replaced with the ones in your iTunes Library, as you stated.

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