Syncing and my old library?

Please help,. I am sure its been asked 100000 but all the ones i find when I google are not really helping
I have a iPhone 4 that I had set up with my computer at home. I am getting a divorce and now have a used computer I got form my brother. He never used itunes. Anyway, I took the hard drive from my ex wife's house and moved my Library of music and pictures to the used computer I am useing. The music, all downloaded from itunes or ripped from CDs are showing on itunes. I do not have any apps on the harddrive, i never felt i need to keep them around. So I am trying now to put new songs on my iphone and its says it will delete everything if i do. Now, I am ok with losing all the music if it just puts it back on. I have all the pictures off. What I am worried about is losing all my apps. I have about 5 pages and all the apps are neatly in easy to find folders. I really would hate to have to re-download all my apps, make all new folders and hope i dont lose data on some of the apps. why cant this be easy? Wouldnt it better if i could just plug it up and click and drag what i wanted. Anyway, if I sync will I lose the apps? I only have it selected to import the music playlist. However the warning says it will erase everything but i dont know if they mean all the MUSIC or EVERYTHING. Also this is my library i was using, just a different harddrive, cant i get itunes to see that?
HELP PLEASE!

You need to copy your entire iTunes folder from your old hard drive to your new computer, not just the music, using one of the methods outlined in this article: http://support.apple.com/kb/HT4527.  This will contain critical iTunes library files that define the association with your phone.  If you do this iTunes will not delete the iTunes media such as apps and music from your phone prior to syncing as it will recognized your phone as already syncing with this library.  You also need to copy over any non-iTunes media you may have been syncing with your computer such as calendars, contacts and any photos synced from your computer to your phone.

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