Syncing calendars between Macbook Pro, iPhone and iPad

Having trouble with this. The calendars were working fine but now they're not. I have three calendars - one on iCloud that I use for personal stuff, the others on two exchange accounts that I use for work emails etc.
The Macbook Pro is brand new (yesterday) but copied all setting from previous computer which is also having problems as of this week so it's not the new gadget that's the problem. The iPhone and iPad have always synced fine until this week.
Now if I put an appointment into calendar on one device, it sometimes shows up on one or both of the other devices - but not always. This is scary as I am getting double booked and forgetting to go to things so I am desperate! I considered deleting the accounts and reinstalling them but they might lose the data so this seems very risky. Any advice gratefully received - thanks in advance...

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in pop there is a setting to leave the mail on the server ... I would have one main device that i used for managing .. ie. deleting email, and use the others for just reading. obviously the macbook would be the managing device ... but i have to say a laptop is not a great email manager because of the limited storage. alternatively you can start to use imap where all the email stays and is managed on the server, then your mobile-device-only lifestyle will work better and you do not have to worry about backups if your ISP takes care of that.
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your philosophy seems to be to stay mobile and light. i archive all my email forever ... at least anything I think is important or personal. just a different workflow i guess. in future i will move my mail folders to a readynas box with 12TB storage because of the size of multimedia is going to be getting bigger and bigger. Goggle's email already allows 20MB emails.

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Hi,
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Turn on File Sharing on both computers (really only needed on the machine with the songs). I presume you have a network connecting the two computers, AirPort?
From Finder on the MPB, select Network (make sure "Connected Servers" is selected in Finder Preference / General). Attach to the source computer's HD so you can see the folder containing the iTunes music.
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Wi-Fi: How to troubleshoot Wi-Fi connectivity
http://support.apple.com/kb/HT4628
iOS: Troubleshooting Wi-Fi networks and connections
http://support.apple.com/kb/ts1398
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