Syncing my iPhone with Calendars & Contacts

When I sync my iPhone with my computer I get 1 or 2 things. Either it duplicates most of the contacts on my iphone, and calendar. Or, it says that if I sync I will lose a high percentage of my contacts on my computer.
What's up with that? Anyone know a fix?
thanks!

I just can't click restore. I'm too much of a scared-E cat!
I wish I could figure it out. Not only did it duplicate today but this evening right before my eyes, just after I synced my calendar, I saw all of my appointments in one calendar setting disappear! They were there and they vanished while I was looking at them! ...from the computer calendar AND the iPhone calendar! I can't trust this feature anymore. I think I'll have to call for tech support.... bummer, It's probably just a little setting click or something easy....

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