Text messages being sent as iMessages

Hi folks, My wife and I have a strange problem with our iPhone 5's where our SMS messages occasionally get sent as iMessages and as a result we never get them on our phones.
Background - We both have iPhone 5's, I have an iPad 3, she has an iPad 4. All software is the latest updates available. We live in a rural area so wifi is only really available at home and the occasional McDonald's, so the only time iMessage is of any real use is when we are at home and want to iMessage friends. This results in both the iPhone and the iPad informing us that we have an iMessage and quickly becomes annoying during an extended conversation so we have turned off iMessage on our phones and use it exclusively on our iPads.
The problem- on a few occasions in the last 2 weeks we have replied to a SMS message sent by one of us and the SMS reply has been sent as an iMessage. As a result it was not received until we return home and view the iPad. Now I understand that iMessages are supposed to be sent as SMS if the recipient is not able to receive an iMessage but NOT the other way around. It makes even less sense when you consider we both have iMessage turned off on our phones.
Once it occurs it can be ages before the system restores itself to work correctly as well. A few days ago I had returned home to discover the message my wife had sent and was puzzled as to how it happened. I turned off the iPads and checked that iMessage was still off on both our phones (it was). Yet all efforts to send me an SMS from her phone to my phone resulted in an iMessage, not an SMS, the SMS option was not available as it continually defaulted to iMessage. How is this possible?

iMessage does not require WiFi. It requires a data connection. Between iOS devices, if you have iMessage turned on, iMessage is the default. Do you, perchance, have cellular data turned off on your phones? That's the only reason I can think of that you wouldn't get iMessages on your phone outside of a WiFi connection. And yes, both devices will notify you of messages if you have notifications turned on on both. And yes, if your contact is messaging you from an iOS device and your iPad is on at home and your cellular data is turned off on your phone, the iPad would get the message.

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