Time machine fails, now can't eject any external HDs

Question

A series of backup related problems have occurred:
Upgraded to Lion and then TM failed to backup: " Error while copying to backup disk" (using Lacie d2 Quadra HD that has been performing well for 2 years)
I also have a second Iomega MiniMaxHD with a carbon copy clone of my Snow Leopard mac on one partition and a second partition with other iphoto/.itunes/ document backup and now I cannot copy my iphoto library to this HD for a backup: " Operation could not be completed because the item "iphoto Library" is in use", even though all applications are off. Tried multiple times and the transfer of the iphoto library always fails midway through.
I have spent ~8 hours websearching and troubleshooting, including just about all of the TM Troubleshooting steps listed by Pondini
(pondini.org/TM/Troubleshooting) and just need some advice on what to do now because now I am afraid that i have lost both my TM backup and my ability to  backup to other drives because a new problem has arisen: everytime I try to load an external HD I can't eject it: can't eject because error message says that the "Finder is using" the external HD and then I have to Force Eject, risking data loss.
I have so far tried: restart mac, reset PRAM, unplug/verify and repair disk multiple times for all of the external HDs as well as my Macintosh HD; I have erased the Lacie HD and reformatted it while rebooting from Lion Recovery HD and then TM still failed;  I have also tried deleting from the Library my TM plist as well as my iphoto p.list.  I even tried using a brand new Iomega Minimax HD and TM still failed
I have Lion 10.7.4,   2.66 GHz Intel Core i5, 8 gb RAM
Thanks for any help you can give me!

Answer 1

Please read this whole message before doing anything.
This procedure is a diagnostic test. It’s unlikely to solve your problem. Don’t be disappointed when you find that nothing has changed after you complete it.
The purpose of this exercise is to determine whether the problem is caused by third-party system modifications that load automatically at startup or login. Disconnect all wired peripherals except those needed for the test, and remove all aftermarket expansion cards. Boot in safe mode and log in to the account with the problem. The instructions provided by Apple are as follows:
Be sure your Mac is shut down.
Press the power button.
Immediately after you hear the startup tone, hold the Shift key. The Shift key should be held as soon as possible after the startup tone, but not before the tone.
Release the Shift key when you see the gray Apple icon and the progress indicator (looks like a spinning gear).
Note: If FileVault is enabled under Mac OS X 10.7 or later, you can’t boot in safe mode.
Safe mode is much slower to boot and run than normal, and some things won’t work at all, including wireless networking on certain Macs.
The login screen appears even if you usually log in automatically. You must know your login password in order to log in. If you’ve forgotten the password, you will need to reset it before you begin.
Test while in safe mode. Same problem(s)?
After testing, reboot as usual (i.e., not in safe mode) and verify that you still have the problem. Post the results of the test.