Too many Things wrong with my iPOD to list

Okay, I have a 20 GB iPOD with a click wheel (black and white) that I got in 2004. here's the list of things that is wrong with my iPOD:
1. the battery drains much faster than it used to
2. when initially starting the iPOD, it looks like it's low in battery, then it 'magically' restores most of its battery power as shown in the image in the upper right hand screen. but if I play the iPOD for 30 minutes + it runs out of battery again
3. My AC adapter charger doesn't work
4. When I plug the iPOD into the USB as a way to charge it, it sometimes beeps a couple times (from the iPOD) and then shows an image of a blown up battery with about 20% of it filled, but the filling is not moving as if it is being charged.
5. the iPOD is now not being recognized by the PC or iTunes. It only notices that something's been plugged in via USB but it eventually pops up with a window that says the iPOD needs to be updated, even though I have all the updates. If I click on the 'update' button, it doesn't do anything.
6. The battery on the iPOD is now drained. If I turn it on via pressing the button or fooling with the 'hold' switch, it will turn on, and immediately turn off. If I plug it into the USB, it won't do anything at all, not even turn on.
I don't know if all of these problems are because of the battery or something else. Does anyone have an explanation? Thanks

I think there may others who will do the job for you or who will supply you with a battery so you can do it yourself. Google for them.
Are you sure that the cable linking the iPod to the USB port or the ac charger is OK? (it's a lot cheaper to replace than a battery).

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