Tried to move iPhoto library and now can't find it

I can now see that I should not have done this...
PRIOR to backing-up on my shiny new external HD I thought I should do some housecleaning. My wife and I share an old G3 iMac (10.3.9, iPhoto 2.0.1) I wanted us to be able to work off a central repository of photos. Unfortunately our broadband connection has been on the fritz and I didn't have access to these forums WAH!
I used the finder to try to move our main iPhoto Library folder from my wife's user directory to one in Shared. Apparenly I didn't have the permission set to allow my wife's account to make this move. This was an attempted drag and drop - but when I tried to drop, I got a permissions error.
I then logged-in as myself (I have the greatest powers, so I figured...) and checked/set the permissions on the Shared folder. (Idon't now specifically recall whether the Shared folder was inaccessible to my wife's (admin) account, tho it would seem strange for someone not to be able to write to a "shared" directory)
Nevertheless, after doing this, I can no longer locate my wife's libary folder - with 3 years of family photos. Neither iPhoto sees it, nor does Finder. It's like the whole folder got "dropped" somewhere out of sight when I was unsuccessful moving to Shared.I sense that the files are still around, because 1,700 pix at around 900K each should be more than a gig, and my 38GB cap. HD still has the same 7GB free space it has had recently.
I NEED TO GET THESE PHOTOS BACK! HELP ME PLEASE!
Thank you for any suggestions - you can even whip me for messing with the library in your replies.
G3 Dalmatian!   Mac OS X (10.3.9)  
G3 Dalmatian!   Mac OS X (10.3.9)  

I FOUND THEM I FOUND THEM!!!!!!
Just as you said Brie Fly, it got dropped and hidden - in MY trash, therefore when I searched without revealing hidden files, i couldn't see it. I swear I looked at that trash can in the dock a number of times - but it must have been under my wife's account - whose trash is empty.
So although I got the library running - it is in my user account. I cannot write to my wife's pictures folder from my account. I have to find an equally accessible (shared?) folder - but will do it using copies, keeping the original safe and sound. before anything though - a HUGE thanks to you, and a full back up on my SHINY NEW EXTERNAL HARD DRIVE!
Wooo Hoooo!!!!! you can't imagine the depths of despair and now corresponding joy - we have 3 young kids and the prospect of losing 3 years of them. (3/4 - 1/3 of their lives) was devastating. Holy Toledo...REDEMPTION! (I hope my boss will understand about my spending just about the whole day working on this.)

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