Trying to update my iPhone and now i have to restore it... any help?!

i've just tried to update my phone to IOS 6.1 (the latest update) and now my iPhone 4S isn't recognised by iTunes and saying i need to restore it. help?! can't access my phone, its in 'connect to itunes mode', tried restarting both macbook pro and 4S, no luck.
i'm loathed to restore it as my last few back ups have been unsuccessful.
thank you!

As for not wanting to restore, you don't have a choice. It's in recovery mode, which means anything that was on the phone is already gone.
Here's a support document on how to correct the problem wih iTunes not recognizing it: http://support.apple.com/kb/TS1591

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