Update to "when I open itunes I have no library"

Have checked my "my music" folder in windows explorer and all my music is still listed in my itunes folder. When I go into the folder marked "itunes library" I get a message saying windows cannot open this folder.
Looks like if I get this folder to open I will have my itunes library restored.
Wary about reloading itunes in case I overwrite this folder and lose my library.
Can anyone give me an idiots guide as to how to restore this folder or get round this problem.

OK, here's what I have done.  I have reloaded all my songs onto iTunes.  I closed the program, shut down my comp and waited a day.  After turning on my comp the next day, I opened iTunes, and my library was immeadiately sent to the recycle bin and my iTunes was "reset" to the orignal settings that I had deleted: Set just for music, NO MusicMatch, NO playlists for 90s songs, classical music, etc.
The two files in my recycle bin were: iTunes Library Extras and iTunes Library Genius.  Upon looking at the properties, these files were made in June 2011.  I restored them to their original location, but nothing happened to my iTunes screen, so I closed it.  Upon opening it again, they were again sent to the recycle bin and new files were put into their place....along with more .tmp files.
I have no idea where to look for any scans of these files...I have Norton 360 to do my scanning.  I don't know what settings I should have in my iTunes preferences so that this doesn't keep happening. 
It used to never do this.  It basically started in the summer of 2011 when I upgraded iTunes to the newer version.

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