Updated 2 iPhones, now both my contacts and wires are joined and when I text her it comes from herself, ***?

Updated both phones this morning, not sure why but when I text my wife it shows it as coming from her own phone.
Both of our contacts were joined together and when I deleted her contacts from my phone it also deleted them from hers.
icloud ***** !!!!!!!!  What a mess

It is no wonder she is not receiving your messages if she has iMessage turned off in her iPad.
For her to receive iMessages on the iPad, she needs to turn iMessage ON in her iPad and then she needs to be connected to the internet in order to receive them.  This connection can go through WiFi or through cellular data if her iPad has this functionality, but those two requirements are a must.
1. iMessages ON
2. iPad connected to Wifi or cellular data.

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