Updated & now it can't be read, need to restore (?) Help please?

Please help. This may sound stupid, but I must be tech. challenged. I just got my ipod for Christmas & I have spend night after night reading discusions trying to get it to work. My husband keeps reminding me about that 1. Initial problem, I could not transfer songs. Never resolved that 1, but at least it WAS showing up in itunes.
Now, for some reason, I've updated software (that was new to begin with) & now my ipod is not able to be read. It says restore factory settings... there was never anything put on it yet. This thing is brand new & for the price, I expected to plug it in & it does the work. Everything I read is extremely detailed. How can I fix this & get it running on "everyday language" terminology? I was unable to open the manual I downloaded (tech. challenged).
Dell   Windows XP   ipod 30GB w/video

Thank you for helping! Another late night!
Looks like there is a conflict with different versions of ipod up-dater & itunes. My problems started when I updated from a 10/05 ed. to an 11/05 ed., thus my "ipod manager internal error". After I used my disc to reinstall, I was able restore my (still empty) ipod. Now it is showing up in itunes again! Hurray!! It will be a long time before I update again. I wonder if it is really necessary when it is brand new?
Thank you again! Now I just need to figure out how to put my 3rd party music onto my ipod. That was my initial problem I thought I was fixing by updating. It looks like it is easier to move music from my own CD's. I may be cancelling my music contract with the 3rd party.

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