Using two iphone 4's with my laptop and share same itunes and library

I have a hp dv9000 series laptop, running vista ultimate 64 bit and have recently bought myself and wife iphones for the first time (prev. wiundows mobile users)
I had no problem setting up my phone, putting some of my music on it, arranging apps etc. through itunes. most of the "syncing" is manual, since i use google calendars, tasks, notes etc sync'd thorugh microsoft excange so they r backed up on the "cloud" without mobile me.
The question is, now i want to add some of our music from our 5000+ song shared itune library to her iphone, and when connecting it to my laptop, itunes comes up with a box, saying there is already another phone set up with itunes and has all my iphones info...
it will let me change it to my wifes info, cell number, name of phone etc. but it seems to be asking if i want to switch phones being sytnc'd...
I'm afraid if i continue it will screw up my phone as i've read in my searching of this forum conflicting claims as to weather or not itunes for windows can handle 2 iphones on the same computer, itunes and library!!!
Anybody have a definitive answer????
Thanks in advance for the help,
John

Not sure what you are seeing, but when you set up a new iphone, you have the choice of using the backup of the other/old iphone ( you would do this if you were replacing your iphone with another) or set up as a new iphone ( this would add the additional iphone).

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