What is the best way to manage my iTunes accounts/libraries on my new iMac

I just bought a new iMac and I'm stymied as to what I should do in terms of importing my old iTunes music.
Here's what I've got:
1 new iMac
1 desktop PC with MY iTunes account (once I take the iTunes music off of here, I'll be done with this computer)
1 laptop PC with my wife's iTunes account - (this laptop will still be used for a while to come)
2 iPhones - each one is currently set to our individual accounts.
What I want:
My wife and I no longer need separate iTunes accounts (if that makes it easier in the long run...?). I'd like to have all music combined from our PCs and playable on the new iMac. Also, I want the entire library playable on the laptop. I'd like to be able to make purchases on either computer and have them available on either computer without too much hassle, but I'm not sure this is even possible. And, of course, I'd like to be able to sync each of our iPhones to the iMac but with different users (pulling from the same library, but with different apps on each - if possible).
Needless to say, I've convinced myself this is the most confusing iMac/iTunes migration ever. I'm a Mac newbie, so I'm sure you guys know a lot more and have good suggestions for what I should do. THANKS FOR YOUR HELP!!!

Hi
Thanks for that. But do I have to us the external disc, moving it from PC to Mac or is there a better way?. Can you directly connect the systems. I assume wifi is too slow as the size is about 10G
Chris

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I am presuming that we cannot share downloaded apps and music between accounts because of the copyright issue,
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