Why does it keep spitting out my disk?

I just got a new MacBook Pro and I'm trying to install Office Mac. I put the disk in, it takes it, and a second later, spits it out. What's the deal? Do you have to do something before you insert a disk?

No, you don't need to do anything before inserting a disk.
Open 'Console' in the utilities folder of application and look at the log messages. That should give you some clues.
It might be a bad disk - try and see if another machine will mount it. If it spits out other disks, the drive could be bad.
Try resetting your SMC controller and PRAM (google this) to see if it solves things. This solved a drive issue I once had with a new MBP.
If none of the above helps, consider taking it back to the store or phone applecare (you have free telephone support and I guess they'll go through steps similar to above).
Good luck.

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