Why is all of my music greyed out on my iPhone 4?

I haven't been able to sync my iphone with my iTunes music for several months now, which is getting increasingly frustrating, and as the holiday season approaches, I really need something to tune out all the holiday music >:-|.
To avoid all the obvious questions: I am running the newest version of iTunes (11.0) and iOS (6.0.1), I have over 4 1/2 gb free on my phone, I have unselected and selected different folders of music (being sure it can all fit in space available on my phone), attempted to auto-fill free space and not, restarted iTunes, my computer, my phone, shut down all the apps, connected and disconnected my phone to my computer, and connected and disconnected the wi-fi sync. Changed settings to sync only checked songs, and manually manage music and back, I have attempted a sync every step of the way.
The music shows that it is syncing, the blue bar of music content volume shows that it's filling up, then at the end of the sync it disappears again. My music folder on my phone has all of the songs I want to sync listed but greyed out and unplayable.
Reading through a bunch of other discussions I have found a few unsuccessful solutions and have attempted this: http://support.apple.com/kb/HT1747, as reccomended, but my efforts were thwarted with a "iTunes can’t be modified or deleted because it’s required by Mac OS X." message, so I didn't get very far.
I cant seem to make podcasts sync either, but books seem to sync fine.
I did to a restore when the problem first happened, but am afraid to do it again as my iCloud is also acting up (another battle for another topic...) and I'm afraid I will lose everything.
Am I missing something really obvious? Why isn't this working???

Hello Donna,
Thank you for using Apple Support Communities!
It sounds like you have some purchases that for one reason or another are grayed out and will not play on the iPhone.
You can delete the songs and then download them again for free from the iTunes store.
Delete a song from iPhone: In Songs, swipe the song, then tap Delete.
From: iPhone User Guide
http://manuals.info.apple.com/en_US/iphone_user_guide.pdf page 61
And then to re download the song use this article.
Downloading past purchases from the App Store, iBookstore, and iTunes Store
http://support.apple.com/kb/HT2519
All the very best,
Sterling

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If they are iTunes purchases that you bought on your phone then have you copied them over from it to your computer's iTunes ? If that is the computer that you sync the phone to then you should be able to copy them over by connecting it and doing File > Devices > Transfer Purchases. Or (depending upon what country that you are in) you might be able to redownload them directly on your computer's iTunes via the Purchased link under Quicklinks on the right-hand side of the iTunes store homepage.
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Date: Thu, 13 Sep 2012 21:16:01 -0600
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: why is my automation tools now greyed out?
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Why is all of my music greyed out on my iPhone 4?

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