Windows 7 (64 bit), iTunes 9 (64 bit), iPhone 3GS = CRASH!

I have just bought a brand new Sony Vaio laptop with Windows 7 (64bit), 500Gb of disk space, 6Gb RAM, multi-core processor etc etc. I've installed the 64bit version of iTunes and transferred over my iTunes library (about 35Gb worth).
When I connect my iPhone 3GS, iTunes sees it no problem and starts to update it (my playlists only copy about 10Gb of music over + some photos, videos and podcasts - iPhone has about 10Gb out of 32Gb free after sync). But iTunes then carries on displaying the message "Syncing iPhone..." in the top window and if I look at the performance monitor whilst this happens, the memory usage goes up, and up, and up steadily increasing until all 6Gb is used with 100% CPU usage, and the PC eventually runs out of resources and stalls/crashes, without the Sync ever completing.
If I reboot and repeat the process, cancelling the sync half way through, the CPU immediately comes down, and the memory too.
Am I doing something daft here? I've tried uninstalling iTunes and reinstalling, making sure I used the 64bit link from the iTunes download pages, but this happens every time.
Has anyone else seen this issue, or know what it is?
The PC is fully patched, has MS Security Essentials installed, nothing else is running at the time, and the iPhone is using the latest OS version.
PLEASE HELP!!

Hello again.
Yes, I've removed all the Sony Bloatware, including all the audio and video scanning processes.
When I look at the processes running when the problem is occuring, it is iTunes.exe taking up all the CPU and memory. Very little else appears to be affecting things.
You're probably familiar with the sequence of events when syncing - iphone is detected (pop up message from Windows about transferring photos), syncs music and photos and videos and apps, then returns to generic "Syncing Pete's iPhone 3GS" message, (usually the last thing before it says "Sync complete" and then sits there - this is when the processor goes to max and RAM steadily increases.
I've checked the Sony website and downloaded all updates and installed.
Does anyone know what iTunes is doing in this last bit of the Sync process?
Peter

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