When trying to load onto my sons ipod shuffle i keep getting the message 'the ipod update server could not be contacted'. The ipod has never been used and has been sitting in a drawer.  It seem to charge but I cannot load any music for him.

Should say, I have tried altering the LAN setting to 'automatically detect settings', updating itunes etc but nothing has worked.  I have a very unhappy 6 year old!

You should not get that message if you are simply trying to load the shuffle with songs from your iTunes library.  If iTunes is trying to Update or Restore the shuffle, and you get that message, try the suggestions in this article
http://support.apple.com/kb/TS1814

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