The trouble with all of Verizon's websites.

Ok, here's the background...
Where I live, I cannot get satelite or wireless. (Terrain. I live in the mountains.) There is no cable. And although there is a DSL capable Verizon sub-station within half a mile of my home, (And many others here.), Verizon refuses to bring DSL to our community. (Even though it has brought DSL to other, much smaller communities, much **bleep**her out in the sticks than we are. It's very frustrating.)
So... I do not have broadband.
All of Verizon's pages, this one included, are optimized for broadband. On my dialup connection, that translates to a whole lot of waiting, every time I click.
This translates to problems getting logged/timed out. Half the time I cannot even get my bill paid before I get timed/logged out.
As if all that were not enough, every time that I log in... during the process, the loooooong process, of logging in, I am diverted to an adpage.  I have to wait for that page to complete loading, then click no thank you, and HOPE that by the time it takes me to my billing page... I haven't already been timed/logged out...
Adding frustration... The adpage is for "Call Assistant". I would like to sign up for that. Both because I would like the service, and because I am hoping that doing so will get rid of the adpage...
But, because of the dialup/broadband nature of my connection and your web page... When I try to sign up for the service, I get as far as accepting the terms and submitting the form... and then I am left in limbo. I have tried this 4 or 5 times now. One time I actually left it sitting there with that bar scrolling across, then across again, then again... Telling me that it was loading my confirmation page... For more than 26 minutes. It STILL never loaded the confirmation page. I am assuming this is because... Yeah you guessed it... It TIMED OUT !! Every time that I have tried it.
Would you please either, 1. Bring DSL to my community so I can HAVE broadband, or 2. Fix your website pages, (ALL of them), so that I don't have to have broadband to use them, or 3. At LEAST get rid of that adpage that I get re-routed to, every time I log in... 
 Thank you.

About Verizon bringing broadband to you, see as need be:
 Verizon Forums : Residential Products and Services : High Speed Internet and Dial-Up : How do i conv...
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