My wife and I split up and I was given the iPad but she is still know what I am doing on it. Supposedly when I got the iPad there was a program that we set up so we could know what is happening on the iPad how do we stop that? She can still see my text

My wife and I split up and I got the iPad. But she still knows what I am doing on it. Even though I changed my apple i.d password and everything. She knows who I am talking to what I am doing on fb, my iMessage, emails, how do I get my privacy back without losing all my apps, book and movies I paid for?

Sorry, but you are describing many different problems all in one go.  Have you changed your FaceBook account and the passwords for all your email accounts ?
You say you have changed all the passwords for all the accounts you use, including your Apple/iTunes account if you have one.  If this hasn't done the trick I suggest you restore your iPad to factory conditions, set it up again from scratch, and download the things you've paid for again.  You will not need to pay for things bought through your iTunes account again.

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