New to Apple - Need help.  Here is the breakdown. I just got my wife a iPhone 4s and I'm trying to decide how to set it up. Should she get her own Apple ID or use mine? This for some reason is very confusing to me.

Here is the breakdown.  I just bought my wife a new iPhone 4s and I'm trying to decide how to set it up for her.  Should she have her own Apple ID or use mine?  If she uses my Apple ID, will that cause issues with iMessage - say when I'm chatting with someone else and vice a versa. Will our messages show up on each others devices?  How will a FaceTime call work?  Will the video call come across both our devices (ipad also)?
Just some information that might be of note:
I have the new iPhone 4s, iPad2 and one iTunes account - the iTunes account is my Apple ID which I use also for the iCloud (I think...it's getting murky
What am I trying to achieve is having the ability for me (iphone, ipad) and my wife (iphone) to be able to share and sync just music, apps, movies, etc...  I have Google Calender and I have not made up my mind yet if we will share a contacts list (I have large business list).  Also this might be of note, I most likely will be using iTunes on my LG LCD TV (appleTV) at some point in the near future.
So, basically I'm confused, which is not unusual for me.  If I'm thinking to much inside the box, please let me know and feel free to offer up any suggestions.  Even if the suggestion is I'm not asking the right questions.  Of course if that is your suggestion, then please tell me the question.  And an answer would be nice to. 
Thanks.
Bentley

No it's not stealing. They have an allowance that you can share with so many computers/devices. You'll have to authorize her computer to play/use anything bought on your acct. You can do this under the Store menu at top when iTunes is open on her computer.
As far as getting it all on her computer....I think but I am not sure (because I don't use the feature) but I think if you turn on Home Sharing in iTunes it may copy the music to her computer. I don't know maybe it just streams it. If nothing else you can sign into your acct on her computer and download it all to her computer from the cloud. Not sure exactly how to go about that, I haven't had to do that yet. I wonder if once you authorize her computer and then set it up for automatic downloads (under Edit>Preferences>Store) if everything would download. Sorry I'm not much help on that.

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