ITunes & iPhone 3GS are both locked up (trying to sync to OS4.3.3) - PLEASE HELP!

I am trying to sync my iPhone 3GS with iTunes to update to the most current OS, but both are locked up.  What do I do?!?  Please help

I am having the same problem. I tried to update my iPhone 3GS this morning and the update failed. Then the iPhone disappeared from iTunes and my computer won't recognize that it's plugged in. Also the phone's screen shows the don't-disconnect-because-I'm-updating icon and won't shut down when I hold down the power button. Help.

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