Apple Support??? Are you listening??? Manual calendar sync???

I had a simple question:
How do I manually sync Calendar and Contacts with Exchange?
I and others have asked this, but no response from Apple. Is there any way to submit a question to Apple? I heard such great things and this is my first Apple product, but there seems to be no support - i can file a bug report of feature request but it goes into a black hole.
Today i noticed I had a calendar appointment in Outlook but not on my phone. I change its time, added notes, etc. but it would not sync. Finally i copied it to later in the day, and it did sync. I deleted the original, and changed the time on the copy, and now i have it.
I really thought that when Apple announced the 3G with ActiveSync support, that after 6 months of dev time, and a mature protocol like ActiveSync that this would be a slam dunk - wow was i wrong.
The Calendar and Contacts features on the phone are not ready for enterprise at all. I can't display some contacts by business name first - it is ALWAYS by person name. Calendar doesn't allow you dial an embedded number for a con call. I feel like i am living in the windows mobile world many revs ago......

Blackberry has opposite issues, calendar events that don't disappear even though they are deleted in Exchange and outlook.
I agree they all have some issues, but I am really frustrated that Apple claimed enterprise support and a business enabled phone, yet they left out basic usability queues to the user. All I want is a way to know that my calendar and contacts are up to date. A "last synced date" at the bottom like Mail does would be simple and easy - or just a big ActiveSync "Sync" button and a message that said "Sync of Contacts, Calendar, Mail" successful.
I have read numerous articles regarding the pains Apple goes to for Mac usability, even where a button is placed. But i think they skipped the usability testing in order to get ActiveSync support out the door.

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    Woodwyn wrote:
    <...>
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    Woodwyn wrote:
    <...>
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