No battery available - no service either ...

Hi there,
After applying the 10.5.8 up date my system (macbook 15" early 2011) did a reboot, followed by a shutdown. Next the system restarted and shut down again ... so I started to wonder ... manually started, it did boot up - however something was different to 10 minutes earlier. In the toolbar there now was a battery symbol with an X in it and an interesting message: No batteries available - Power source: battery.
The message itself is a joke, anyway - tried SMC reset and PRAM reset but the issue still exists. I disconnect the magsafe and the device shuts down immideately .. though I was on battery previously and had like 70% left when I started the update ...
Ok I thought, lets try again - SMC reset - doesnt even to take place - next idea: take it to the local Apple Store ....
VERY bad idea, in fact I explained the situation to one of the employees, reminded him that I am not amused that it seems that my battery in my Macbook seems to have gone *POP* now the third time and you know it, work needs to be finished.
After pointing out out that they are pretty busy due to all the students back at uni - wonder what this refers to - I would need to make an appointment with the geniusbar ... well what do I need an appointment, I would rather leave it there to get it fixed asap as the behaviour is pretty obvious: not charging, software says no battery attache, without power adapter the leds on the battery dont lid up nor does the system start up ...
checking the available appointments, sets me back to Thursday this week (its Saturday) ?!?!? ... so I lean back to the employee and quickly confirm:
Sorry Chap, are you telling me I need to make an appointment for an more less obvious issue, a) Thursday (4days) earliest and  b) when people who still got a job, wont have the tme to come to the store anyway?? repsonse: well, thats the ealiest one available ... my response was: that cant be true, that I can order a new machine BTO and have it with me, earlier than I can get someone to at least confirm the obvious issues with my device ... so I asked for other options. AASPs ... he entered the URL to identify the AASPs in the area - well within 50 miles ... but after contacting all of them I realised from time of dropping off the device it will take me 7-21days to get it back ...
The question I got now is obvious: premium product no longer has a premium service?
Pretty shocked to be honest that there is no support available - majority of the people waiting for the genuisbar were standing there with a small device in their hands ... I didnt see a single person with any bigger than an iPad ...
I might just buy a temporary one tomorrow and return it within 14days for the time being as it seems that I cant get any support in time, except anyone has another idea what I could try to get it sorted ...
did anyone else had such a poor experience lately as well?
cheers
nor4nd0m

User Tip:  Apple notebook batteries – maintenance and troubleshooting Batteries
Apple/About This Mac/More Info/Hardware/Power/Battery Information - copy and paste the information here. Do not include any serial numbers.

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